For as long as I remember, my brain has been in a constant state of conflicting contrasts. It’s pushed and pulled me into quiet and chaos on repeat, both sides exhausting each other while also getting bored at the same time. I’ve spent most of my life feeling like I needed to choose sides and it never worked. I never felt “right”. Feeling constantly misunderstood I began to shrink myself into someone I couldn’t recognize no matter what I changed around me.

In 2022 I had an opportunity to blow up my life and I took it. I decided to finally put myself first and see who I was without other peoples ideas of me. It was a necessary nightmare! I had long relationships end (many), hid in the Arizona desert for a while, and stripped away everything I once knew. During these incredibly precarious few years, I have learned more about myself than I bargained for.

Having learned well into my 40’s that I have Audhd, has been an incredibly clarifying, and definitely not easy. However, it explains everything that I have struggled with for so long. The need for chaos and quiet constantly battling each other makes sense now.

I see that duality of my years of work. Simple and quiet and also colorful and alive. I’m relieved that the pressure to choose is gone and I can finally lean into both.

You can find my photography work HERE